Mine All is mine!
Stanza 1: this is a me
i)The black hole of the self is in a sense bottomless.
ii)Or rather it has a n spoken and unspeakable bottom beyond reason or rhyme.
iii) If the selves claims really were true – f everything were about it, and for it alone then in a sense wither of who things would be the case.
iv)Either the world would vanish into something utterly sterile and problematic. My stale fantast and noting more.
v)My right o clued death (as it is merely my idea) would become then my right to exclude anything beyond a me- any I had not pre-thought – anything that gave life or communicate a greater life than mine.
vi)Or to put it another way one would be locked with the stales series of fantasies ultimately able to produce anything more that he set one as.
vii)Ultimately even this set would of course be problematic –as wheel did one get the ideas for this set for – surely that implies something other/
viii)If one goes down the other r[at as admits (as one surely must) that the is something else, something other in ones mind- one is then caught in a n unholy trap.
ix)Were after all is this other?
x)If it is I do own mind then ones pretension that oneself exists alone is only mad because one has allowed others to be in that self. It claim then comes empty. It admits of the important point of the other- hat they are falling from elsewhere and only conceals the minor (that that elsewhere is real).
xi)\That is the other the capacity to be swept alone which we can only configure elsewhere is ultimately absolutely only given in a world beyond me.
xii)All assertions of ones own right alone as therefore ultimately and absolutely groundless.
xiii)Or to put it another way extreme claims for selfhood always risk pulling the claim and claimant down to nothing
Stanza two
Where am I then?
i)in a sense this last point does not matter if one can war a world into ones own image.
ii)The self has then its power not be simply imposes what it is into the world. It is rather the awaiting that leeks out across othering elements of the world and warps them.
iii)The self is then best understood as the heat of this trap It is the trap that awaits- the trap others must look to and for and through.
iv)I am therefore in requiring others to dance around me.
v)It is my request, my demand that makes others move and remove.
vi)The best actions of the self are always the one delayed.
vii)That delay might then impose agony upon another. This agony of mind in which the self feels its own rights: that is its own unlimited ability to have an effect.
viii) Or it might be a point of generosity. So long as the self has ceased control of the mechanisms of delay then it is content. It does not then mind allowing others to use these powers if they respect it through them/
ix)The self is therefore in a sense always the ally of memory
x)It is always what will run over the remembered and claim it for its own.
xi)It is always that which wants these memories for its own, and in being its own province.
xii)The self is therefore what effortlessly claims the rights to its memories – to all adjuncts of the past that tumble into the or form the pas.
xiii)It claims of course in this the rights not just to its own pasts but also to others pasts as well.
xiv)This is memory as it was dragged out of me through the actions of another was never really mine.
xv)However the self which in houses itself within this stream of experience eyes very unlikely to make such a distinction.
xvi)It merely knows that it is and that in being – as it is it will exist across the wave of time in whatever memories to wants to.
xvii)It turns then it memories that is the shards of another that steam into it, bandit rights to order delays in these flakes into what it is.
Stanza 3 what it is part 1:
i)the self is then the holding of whatever is at land as its own. Its house (body) might not be its own, the information it pins a me on might not be its own – but no matter That does not matter to the misering mind. It can claim the rights to them.
ii)In doing so it of course claims the rights to what does not belong to or though it. It claims the rights to others heaps pr seeks to.
iii)It wants the whole lot in the past.
iv)It does so even though as that past was caught up in the resent is was something different, something othered.
v)It had a power in the present which could not be held down in the self.
vi)It might have othering powers in the past as well – if only it were allowed.
vii)That is the self might claim this or that abut its memories up ultimately these claims are groundlessly in that the self is that which claims the rights to these memories- change the memories then exactly where the self is of course changes and moves on.
viii)What ironically makes the self powerful though within this series of thoughts is the very fact that the memory that as it claims a series of memories for its own, others included other version of what it is agree to this claim.
ix)I am because you (and other me’s) agree this set of elements are mine.
x)If they did not – if there was not someone else watching the entire enterprise and approving r at least not interfering then I doubt I can claim these for my own.
xi)We need each other and the stories we still to be a self. We claim a currency as own- own memory but then look to others even here to configure that memory and confirm the open set of experience as an body in which a self can then function.
xii)Memory alone would probably not be enough; The same memories could be shared by many selves, not all of tem internal to a me (my past might have led to other me’s or it might be the past of my siblings).
xiii)But this does not mean that as long as my claim to have this past, my rights are respected.
Stanza 4: What I am part 2
i)what o course makes the self is the excess of feeling.
ii)It is that impossible sate that he experience we all share are blended with a series of passion and made or driven into significance.
iii)It is never the shit that buggers one up- it is the endless reaction to it.
iv)Those with the least wrong can very easily be the maddest –a s there is little justice here.
v)We arrange our minds in passion and in stories.
vi)The passion mark the partner s I start at-
vii)The stories demand that other sympathize.
viii)This sympathy then is the agent in which on thinking about it I feel my frights.
ix) I erupt into therefore a world were I demand in others reaction in their very terror or allowing for me to be at all –I become a self.
x)This is therefore is a sense very much set against self.
xi)If those others held the true path of the perceiving mind and ignored the me here then I really would not amount to much.
xii)I would be a mere rag bag of unuttered feeling and held measured thought – and sod all else.
xiii) Every feeling I had would be challenged as unreasonable (they all are you see),a and every experience I claim could be that of anther (me or you). I would be nothing
xiv)It I only then the effect of others – their allowance of the me that allows me to be.
xv)In this allowance I become myself- become something rather special and powerful. I start to matter.
xvi)To be what I am therefore is to be at this pointer I become in and through the gaze of another .
xvii)I cease therefore the rights to call people what I want, and to be impolite.
xviii)But more than this once the feeling real gets started there can belittle rhyme or reason and very little kindness in this process.
xix)On the contrary the self is more powerful the further it pushes the entire process and the more injust it is in its claims.
xx)If the world is only mind in greedy vapid demands I better keep on demanding.
xxi)I better extend my claims of me own these memories into fantasy and across othering rights.
xxii)I better make good those bits of advice I gave a you, and claim that thy give me the right to make this all about a me.
xxiii)I better extend and counter extend what I am.
xxiv) The self therefore has its own logic: it wants to saw away at foundation is others to assert or grow its rights.
xxv)If of course it pushes the entire affair far enough then it would collapse.
xxvi)And yet it this always the case that others will be a little unwilling to prick the selves pretensions.
xxvii)This is because there is always an implicit use in recognizing the self. Tat is the others will always can something by he arbitrary delays and odd dance it imposes upon them.
xxviii)It imposes a rigour to their life, it allows then space in its greedy demands and its fantasies that might not otherwise be there.
xxix)It power might ultimately be founded on untruth An yet as long as others need that truth they need the slf as the agent capapble, of forcing it on the world.
xxx)A self is therefore useful for others to
xxxi); it very existence, its very selfish wonderings are enough to give a buttress to some one else somewhere else.
What I am not myself alone
i)One needs to be so careful in plotting to be a self. There exist endless handbooks and lessons for being.
ii)(which is of course a rich irony).
iii)But all these handbooks have the Same problem – that they are.
iv)That is that they run against the very selfishness they advocate.
v)The problem here is not really one of logic – but effect.
vi)I teach myself to be – a create a self and others looking on might want something of the action.
vii)They start to assert themselves within this my space.
viii)They demand they are and keep on making this demand in and through their selves.
ix)They demand and in making that demand makes use of those resources I had stored up for myself.
x)These thing these stories these memories were meant to e all about me –a and yet that me appears to have slipped into something or somewhere else.
xi)Thy are now apparently about a you- or about something else or…
xii)What I am therefore is caught up in another’s ability to muscle in and make themselves where Would have been.
xiii)The problem s that if they do this powerfully enough and with due vigour it is so very difficult to stop them from doing so.
xiv)You will have stolen all my best lines and half my passionate resource you see- and only an ac of utter violence can pitch such a self out of the orbit of myself.
xv)That is self’s are genuinely vulnerable to other selves which can at the movement of inception of oneself or better just before that inception – in the inceiving take all the material that was going to be used o stoke up an identity and use it in their own.
xvi)One needs therefore as one build to be careful Not everyone is to be trusted. One needs caution. One needs others in making whole is- but one needs to ensure that these others are not open to the temptation to steal ones forming soul or sick out ones life blood.
xvii)Both moves of the succubus are so much easier than you might think.
What others think.
i)but all this leaves of course the mystery of what others are doing a self mature or forming is whirling around.
ii)Are they being caught up in it and being forced to dance its tune?
iii) Or are they merely going along with it
iv)That is allowing it but not really listening?
v)Are that passively copying it – or using it?
vi)Are they being bruised by it?
vii)Or are they listening very carefully for other elements othering movement within that self- the pointer of time which might – just might pull elsewhere and towards other places the self might assert.
viii)That is within the self selfish meandering there might be moment which oldest to themselves explode into other times and othering places.
ix)They moments- they echoes of a beyond would have a paradoxical status.
x)If they are the moment self explode on one level that are conceded to the self.
xi)Tat is they are allowed this property.
xii)And yet only on the condition that that self does not conceal these elements – that thy allow them to stand – even if they unpick the entity of the self itself.
xiii)The self therefore includes element which might destroy it- and yet which the very logic of time with allows its to be the logic of the other world which it has assume to be its own, would insist that it respects these elements this risk that there is always another factor involved.
xiv)The self claims mastery over truth other to be at all = but that other might always not include the self or might go elsewhere- and there is bugger all the self can or should do about it.
xv) The very price of it being therefore include elements which it can master and which might pitch it utterly beyond everything it could or should be.
xvi)It caught up therefore in including the dynamite that could a other times destroy it- and all its passion all its assertion to create and hold down being are not enough to escape this power.
xvii)It onto put it another way = passions are strong and yet hey are confined within a single entity and there are always power elsewhere which might div into that entity and destroy it.
xviii)These powers therefore are a risk the self in its passionate ignoring of others must risk.
xix)Or to put it another way – memories are never enough to house being within: They are never fully mine (and are not even if I am the time that makes them)
xx) Deleuze contra Bergson.